Friday, 21 November 2008

What I Didn't Want, Happened

Thursday nights are invariably a night when I don't sleep well.  I know that it is stupid, but I can't help it.  Every Thursday evening I start to become anxious about Friday morning's psychotherapy session.  Last night I didn't sleep at all.  I eventually got myself out of bed and had a long soak in the bath, washed my hair, and got myself dressed.  I left the house at my normal time and walked to the bus stop.  After a wait of about five minutes a bus arrived and I boarded it.  It then took about 20 minutes to travel half a mile. Regular readers will probably have guessed what caused the hold up.  Yes, the roadworks caused by the replacement of London's Victorian water mains are still causing havoc.  The buses are on diversion, but there are even roadworks on the route that they have been diverted onto.

Eventually the bus made it back on to its normal route and apart from another minor hold up caused by yet another set of roadworks for the replacement of the water mains, I eventually arrived at the bus stop outside the hospital.  I walked up the road to the pedestrian crossing and crossed over to the hospital and entered the outpatients department.  I reported to the reception desk and then took a seat to wait for my psychotherapist to collect me.

I will admit that I had my mobile in my hand the whole of the time that I was travelling.  After having received phone calls cancelling my appointment at the last minute for the two previous Fridays, I was prepared for another call today, but it didn't come.  Neither did my psychotherapist.  When it was five minutes after my appointment time, I went back to the reception desk to check that they had phoned to say that I had arrived.  They had.  Another phone call followed; they were trying to find my psychotherapist. Then another phone call; he wasn't answering his phone, it was switched off.  The administrator then decided to send him an email; it came back with an out-of-office message.  Five minutes later there was another phone call; he wasn't in because he was sitting his Royal College of Psychiatrists exams.

I spoke to the administrator again.  My psychotherapist had told me some weeks ago that he would not be available 28th November, I was now wondering whether he had made a mistake over the dates and he should have cancelled our session for today rather than next week.  Or am I not going to have an appointment next week either?  I now have to wait until next week to find out whether I have a session or not.

I have been feeling low over the last couple of weeks, in part because of the way the appointments have been cancelled with no notice.  I will leave it to your imagination to decide what sort of state I was in when I left the hospital this morning.  I don't think you will find it very difficult.

3 comments:

Lily said...

:( Thats awful!! If it's any consolation I hope that they get this all sorted out for you soon. Try to keep smiling!

Alison said...

That is really not good is it... one week yes but to get to so many without an appointment is really not on.

Take care of yourself x

Caroline said...

I am sorry. I know very well how much effort and sheer force of will it takes to meet a commitment, even if it is one that you need or want to meet, when you are feeling like you have the grey blanket over your head. It is then infuriating when that effort is in vain. I hope you feel better soon x