Delivering presentations and demonstrating computer systems were things that I used to do without turning a hair some years ago. However, my worsening depression and acute anxiety meant that I found these things impossible and facing an audience of unknown people filled me with horror. Since having to give up work I have not been required to do such things, and a few months ago I would not have contemplated doing it, but when B asked me to carry out the demonstration because he felt it would add impact to the presentation if done by a patient, I agreed without hesitation. I was still very nervous at the thought, but I have done quite a few things just recently that I would not have considered possible six months ago, so I was willing to give it a try.
The establishment was imposing and I couldn't help but feel nervous as I entered through its doors on Wednesday afternoon and awaited B's arrival so that we could check out the lecture theatre and its audio-visual facilities and discuss how we would approach the presentation. We encountered problems immediately because we found that I could not get logged into the system that I was supposed to be demonstrating. This did not bode well for me. However, B had a few screen shots of from the records of a fictitious patient so I went through these to familiarise myself with what they showed and accepted that if necessary I would use those; it wouldn't have the same impact as doing the demonstration for real with a live record, but it was better than nothing. We chatted for a short while, then tried logging into the database again, and everything worked perfectly, so I ran through what I intended to show and say to B and he proclaimed himself more than satisfied.