Thursday, 17 December 2009

How Am I?

I had a comment today about my last post. Bendy Girl was asking how I was now.

That's the nice thing about bloggers; when you're not feeling your best they rally round with lovely comments and send you virtual hugs to help you feel better.

To be honest, I am not feeling brilliant. I'm trying to take one day at a time and not thinking about Christmas if I can help it. When I was at psychotherapy on Tuesday, the first thing that JR, my psychologist, asked me was how I was feeling. So I told him. I said that I could feel myself going downhill as each day passed. We discussed it for about 10 minutes and then got on with the real stuff.

Perhaps, because he knew I was feeling a bit low, he didn't work me as hard this week as he did last. He asked how I had been after last week's session and when I replied "like a limp lettuce," he laughed. Little did he know that I had described how I was feeling in exactly those terms in this blog.

Today I have been delivering the items that I had been commissioned to knit. 'D' was absolutely thrilled with the cardigan that I had made for her new baby. We had a cup of tea and a good chat about how we had been since leaving hospital. She is a different person to the one who arrived on the admissions ward a couple of days after me, and being back at home with her new baby was all that she hoped it would be.

That took care of this morning, and this afternoon I delivered the cardigan that I was asked to knit by the lady who worked at the assisted-living accommodation that I stayed in when I left hospital. She loved it. The colour that I had chosen was perfect, and it attracted lots of admiring comments from those staying in the accommodation at the moment and from the staff who were there. And there is likely to be another commission in the near future.

So, I have managed to get through another day and while I am not exactly full of the party spirit I am doing my best to keep active and not think about things. When I got home and checked my emails I found one from my OU tutor saying that he had marked my TMA and it was ready for me to collect from the eTMA system. I got 63%, which is not the highest mark I have ever received, but considering I had to cram about 6 weeks work into 2 weeks, and that included asking for a week's extension for me to do the TMA, I am more than happy with it. It's just a short course, but it is helping me to get back into the swing of things, and as it is a creative writing course, there is no right or wrong answer, just how good your writing is. He liked my first and second short stories, but he felt that my third one let me down a bit. I knew that it wasn't as good as the first two, but I have to admit that I find writing fiction quite difficult, so to have written two convincing short stories has pleased me no end.


alhi said...

That's great about the OU course. I hope my students come out with that mark.
I'm glad to hear you've been keeping busy and hopefully the commissions will keep on coming in (wouldn't mind a pair of wrist warmers that seem to be so popular these days!!) so that you're reminded of how many people consider you a good enough friend to ask you to do something like that.
Thanks for the comment on my blog: I appreciated as I was devastated by it and really just wanted to reach for something dangerous. I think I probably did anyway, in the form of alcohol.

Anonymous said...

For what it's worth, you're defintiely doing the right thing in keeping busy. It's too easy to shut down and do nothing when things aren't great. Keep going and ask for help when needed. The virtual hugs I'm sure, will keep coming.

Take care x

Achelois said...

Virtual hug from me to you xoxoxox

BenefitScroungingScum said...

Gah, puts so much pressure on people, and never in a good way!
Great news about the assignment, I think that's a brilliant mark, especially considering the circumstances atm.
Me too on the wrist warmers! Perhaps you could have a blog raffle so we can all compete to win a pair?
Love and hugs, BG Xx

madsadgirl said...

OK BG, wrist warmers it will be. I shall see what wool I can find in my stash (all serious knitters have a stash) and I'll make you a pair. Drop me an email so that we can discuss whether you want short ones or long ones.