Gloomy Monday

If I still went to work I think that I would have turned over and gone back to sleep this morning. Even for a Monday morning it is unbelievably gloomy.

I have been suffering from a particularly nasty period of depression over the last few months. This is always a difficult time of year because of birthdays and anniversaries, but this year seems to have been worse than usual. I'm not usually affected by the weather: I can feel really depressed on sunny days and perfectly happy on rainy ones. At the moment, however, the gloom seems to be making me feel worse and the fact that it is still so dark at this time in the morning means that I am aware that another year is drawing to its close.

Lack of 'good' sleep is also responsible for how I am feeling. If I take sufficient medication to ensure that I sleep deeply and for a reasonable length of time, then I spend the next day having great difficulty keeping my eyes open. If I take a smaller dose, then I drop off to sleep reasonably easily but wake again just a few hours later.

Depression, and gloom, are not good for one's well-being, but you have to try to find things that enable you to get through the day and hope that tomorrow may be better.