Friday, 7 November 2008


It's Friday morning and I have the usual butterflies in the stomach.  Actually, they are more the size of pterodactyls and I can feel them banging and crashing around inside me.  It really is quite bizarre and by this time I ought to be able to cope with my Friday morning psychotherapy sessions without falling prey to these terrors.

I think that I know why I am feeling like this.  I am going to try and start talking as soon as we get settled in the room, like I did last week.  It is this that is preying on my mind and causing high levels of anxiety.  I have also realised that it is getting into this state that is sometimes the trigger for a period of depression.  Knowing that, I am able to tell myself that I really don't have any reason to get depressed and that I must just try to get through the day without worrying too much about anything.

So when I get back from the hospital, I will have something to eat, sit down and reread my TMA and if I am happy with it I will send it off to my tutor.  The rest of the afternoon will be some 'me' time.  I shall sit down with my knitting and watch a DVD or two, and just try to relax.  I have a busy week ahead and there are two really big things occurring on Wednesday and Saturday, which will require me to cope with situations that I usually find so difficult.  I'll let you know how things go later.

1 comment:

alhi said...

The change in your attitude and outlook since I have been reading your blog is so evident. To the extent that I'm considering asking to be rereferred to the psycholgist even though I am not at all keen.