Friday, 31 October 2008

A First At Psychotherapy

For the first time since I have been going to psychotherapy there was not a silence at the start of my session.  Normally, there is a truly deafening silence once we get into the room and sit down, but this morning I actually started talking almost as soon as I had sat down. And I kept talking.  There were short intervals where I was silent, but they were periods of seconds rather than minutes while I pondered what I thought or felt in answer to questions from my psychotherapist.

The last few sessions have been much more like conversations, rather than me having to bare my innermost thoughts and feelings.  It is obvious, even to me, that the therapy is have a beneficial effect.  I even admitted that I was feeling more confident about going to therapy, something that I don't think I could have said just a few short weeks ago.  I was asked if I thought the growing confidence was a permanent thing, but I had to admit that I wasn't sure that this would be the case if I fell into a period of deep depression.  However, I'm not thinking about that.  What's the point of thinking about something that may never happen?

After I got on the bus to come home, I remembered that I needed to get a button for the jumper that I finished earlier this week, so I stayed on the bus past my usual stop and went to the shopping centre nearest my home. I had to buy more than one button as these days they only seem to come on cards of several buttons (fortunately it was only 3 on the card that I bought) and while I was there I also bought some wool to knit a hat and some mittens, and I found some lovely chunky wool being reduced so I bought some to knit another jumper. The hat and mittens will have cost me £2, and the jumper just less than £12.

Just after I got home the postman rang the doorbell because he two packages for me that couldn't be put through the letterbox.  It was the pattern and wool for the Shetland lace shawl that I am going to knit for Kelly's baby.  The wool is the finest that I have ever seen and having seen it, I can understand how a shawl knitted from it could pass through a wedding ring.  Once I have knitted it, I shall certainly give it a try.  The pattern appears quite complicated, but I have been knitting lace shawls for about a year or 18 months so following the complex charts doesn't worry me too much these days.

So now all I have to do is find the time between my study sessions to do all the knitting.  That is one thing about the long winter evenings, there is plenty of time for knitting.


alhi said...

I am glad that you're feeling so much better in yourself especially in the winter months when it so much easier to curl up in bed and do nothing rather than get up and face the world.

cb said...

I'm almost tempted to start knitting myself now to be honest. It seems a lot more productive than most of the things I do in my spare time (er.. watching television!).